Twenty Questions for a Gift
by done.with.marblesxx
Summary: "So why do you need the money?" "No reason!" "Are you getting something for a girl?" Remus clapped when Sirius turned a darker shade of red and stared down at his shoes sheepishly. "Who is it? Who is it?" The boys & Lily vs. Sirius in a wager.
1. one

**Twenty Questions for a Gift**

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><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>This is a drabble-esque story (it's not perfectly 100 words) so _don't ask me to make it longer_. Sheesh. Hope you enjoy the story!

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><p>"Get out of the way!" Someone shot him a dirty glare, but he ignored it. He was too busy mulling over his plan to notice the idiots meandering in his path.<p>

With the right amount of hissing and threatening, Sirius Black eventually wove his way through the crowded Gryffindor common room, ending up behind an armchair. _And t__here she __i__s! _Sirius grinned.

Lily Evans leaned over her Transfiguration essay, face screwed in concentration. She seemed to be trying to remember the wand movements for some Transfiguration Sirius could do in his sleep.

This was going to be _so _easy.

Slithering to the side of the armchair where her bag was tossed carelessly, Sirius sneaked his hand into it, rummaging with a careful eye at Lily. He frowned, trying to find the confounded little–

_Got it!_

Sirius withdrew his hand and began sneaking away, congratulating himself on completing an impossible feat so perfectly–

"_Sirius Black!_"

Damn.


	2. two

"Lily dear! How _are _you?"

Even though he was gushing full-on, Lily wasn't falling for his flattery and charms. Instead, she was glaring at him. Sirius' smile evaporated.

"_My. Wallet._"

"What, dear?"

Lily's eyes flashed. "_You. Stole. My. Wallet._"

Sirius tried to smile again, but his muscles seemed to have frozen in a grimace. "Um, no need for concern. I'm just, er, _borrowing _your... wallet. Obviously."

Lily crossed her arms. She could smell his fear. Sirius Black was a dead man.

"Sirius _dear_, I'm sure you've heard all about my fingernails." Lily extended her hand so Sirius could see her nails in all their sharp glory. Sirius gulped.

"Um, _no_, I haven't heard of your nails." Sirius feigned a smile as he attempted to back away from Lily's extended claws–er, fingernails.

"Well, maybe you would like to learn about them," snarled Lily, pleasantries drained from her face. Sirius stared at her sharp, pointed nails and shook his head.

"No- No thanks–"

Unconcerned about his opinion, Lily lunged with her nails extended.


	3. three

Sirius slowly opened his eyes. He didn't feel any scratches oozing blood. He sure wasn't screaming in pain. Maybe he had died. Or Lily had vanished into thin air?

Nah. She was just flailing in the air, her eyes murderous while Remus had her by the waist, trying to calm her down. James was behind Remus, surveying the scene with amusement.

"James!" Sirius wailed, running to his friend's side. "Your girlfriend tried to kill me!"

"What did you do now, Sirius?"

Sirius crossed his arms. "Why do you always assume I did something? I didn't do anything. I was just trying to borrow some of her money."

Lily growled and lunged again, her teeth snapping an inch from Sirius' nose. He squealed and took another step back.

"Borrow? You mean _steal!_" she shrieked. Sirius feigned shock.

"Why, I would never steal from you_, _Lily!"

"You liar!" she spat. "_Let me go, Remus Lupin!_"

She thrashed in Remus' arms, trying to break away, but with no success. Eventually, she calmed down and hung limply in his arms.

"Isn't that better?" Remus set her down on the ground.

"Thank you," Lily huffed. She glared over at Sirius. He was still clutching her wallet to his chest.


	4. four

"Sirius, return Lily's wallet," said James. "Why were you stealing from her anyway? I would've stolen from Remus."

"Remus was out of money."

"Hey!" Remus stared at the two in shock. "How do you two know how much money I have?"

Sirius and James gave him a blank look. "You always hide the money in the same place." Sirius employed a patient monotone professors used to explain something simple to dunderheads. "Under your mattress."

Remus scowled. "Not anymore."

"Where are you going to hide it next?" James grinned. "In your 'secret drawer'? We all know that's in secret latch of your nightstand drawer, Remus."

"Why do you guys go through my things?" Remus said, irritated.

"We're your mates." Sirius laughed, slapping Remus on the back. Remus made a strangled noise. "It's our business."

While they laughed, Lily sneaked behind Remus and made a lunge for Sirius' face again, but he stepped out of the way just in time, mostly by accident than instinct.

"_James! Control your girlfriend!_" he shrieked, hiding behind his best mate again. "She's trying to tear me to shreds!"

"Damn you for moving out of the way." Lily scowled. She crossed her arms and slapped away James' hands who was futilely trying to calm her down.


	5. five

"Sirius, is there a particular reason you're trying to steal from people?" James asked, curious. Sirius sighed.

"I need the money. And being broke doesn't help either."

"Why do you need money?" Remus probed. Sirius just shook his head, but no one could miss the blush slowly rising from his shirt collar to his cheeks. James exchanged looks with Remus.

"Sirius Black, what are you not telling us?" James frowned, hands on hips. "You know you'll eventually end up telling us, so why don't you confess already?"

"It's nothing," Sirius insisted with a shrug. He was trying to keep his face blank, but the blush had already spread across his cheeks.

"If it's nothing, then why are you blushing?" Remus asked. "I–"

"Hey, that rhymes." Sirius smiled. He was obviously trying to change the subject. Unfortunately, Remus noticed immediately.

"Cool," he said quickly before James could agree loudly and steer the conversation to the obnoxious rhymes he'd made up in the shower. "So why do you need the money?"

"_No reason!_"

"What is it?" Lily, who'd been listening to the conversation, chimed in curiously. "Tell us!"

Sirius scowled at her. "There's nothing to tell–"

"Are you getting something for a girl?" Remus interrupted excitedly. He clapped his hands together when Sirius turned a darker shade of red and stared down at his shoes sheepishly. "Who is it? Who is it?"

Sirius took a seat in Lily's old armchair, leaning back and tapping the arm rest. He ignored the three expectant stares. Remus sighed.

"Sirius Black! Come _on_! Who is it? Why won't you tell us?" Remus scowled, crossing his arms. "You know we'll find out eventually!"

"No you won't," Sirius said curtly. "No way you'll find out who she is."


	6. six

The three scratched their heads, trying to make the stubborn Sirius Black talk. Damn his stubornness!

Suddenly, Lily snapped her fingers. Everyone looked at her. "Sirius, let's play a game," she said. "You let us ask twenty questions to guess who the girl is."

"And why would I do that?"

"Because if we don't guess right, I'll give you the money you need to buy whatever you're buying for that girl," Lily said eagerly. "But _just _for the gift. I'm not paying for a haul from Honeyduke's or crates of Firewhiskey."

Sirius grinned. "Okay, fine. I'm in."

"But," Lily interrupted, "if we guess before twenty questions are up, you have to be my slave for an entire day." Sirius sat up, staring at Lily with wide eyes. She savored the look.

"Evans, are you serious?" He was horrified. "You want me to be your _slave _for a day?"

"Yes." She smiled smugly.

"I didn't know you felt that way about me–"

"Not a sex slave, Black!" she barked, smacking his head.

"Not on my watch," James added darkly. Sirius grumbled, rubbing his head.

"Fine, fine. Whatever. Game's on then. Ask away."

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><p>I add lines about Sirius being a sex slave in so many stories... (Or I think I do) I think that says something about my subconscious... (I WANT SIRIUS AS MY SLAVE)<p> 


	7. seven

James quickly supplied the first question with a wide grin. "Is it for a girl?"

"Yes," Sirius answered boredly. "Didn't we already go over this?"

"I thought it might be for a boy," James said. "Knowing you–"

"_Hey! _I'm straight!"

Sensing an immature bickering (judging by James' wiggling eyebrows and Sirius' venomous glare), Lily interrupted with a question of her own. "Is she in Ravenclaw?"

"No," Sirius said, still glaring at James. "That's two."

"Hufflepuff then?"

"Nope."

"_Slytherin?_" James cried.

"No!"

"A Gryffindor girl then, huh?" James wiggled his eyebrows. Sirius snorted.

"Obviously. That's five questions."

"Is she older than fourth year?" Remus asked. Sirius looked disgusted.

"As if I date girls younger than fourteen?"

"You did, that one time," James began, tapping his chin. "Her name was Clara, I think–"

"I was in fourth year. She was in _third _year. I'm not a pedophile like you, James."

"I'm not a pedophile either!"

"Could've fooled me! Better watch the eyes of this one, Evans. He's always staring at the skirts of the first years–"

"Yeah," James snorted, "because they're always covered in food!"

"Excuses!"

"Oh, shut up, Sirius!"


	8. eight

"So she's older than fourth year?" Remus repeated impatiently.

"Yes. _Definitely._"

"Is she blond?" Lily asked. Sirius shook his head. "Redhead?" Sirius shook his head again. "Brunette?"

"Bingo!" Sirius rubbed his hands together. "Nine questions right there, Evans."

"Is she in any of our classes?" Remus asked.

"Yes."

"Charms?" James inquired.

"No."

"Herbology?"

"No."

"Transfiguration?"

"Yes."

James whistled excitedly, remembering a certain girl in Transfiguration Sirius had talked about. "Is it Ruby Bloom?" he asked, believing he had solved the mystery.

"No," Sirius said wistfully. "Unfortunately not."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Remus frowned. "You don't like the girl you're buying something for?"

"Not right now. She's being sort of mean." Sirius sighed, but brightened up again. "That's fifteen questions. You have five more."


	9. nine

"How are we running out of questions so quickly?" Lily was panicking. She wanted Sirius as her slave desperately. Imagine, making the High and Mighty Sirius Black carry Lily Evans to classes on a throne, butter her toast, polish her shoes. Imagine the degrading possibilities! The fun of having him under her power! She had to get the answer.

"Is the girl on the Quidditch team?" Lily asked, remembering that Sirius flirted often with the girls on the team. They all had brown hair, she thought.

"No," Sirius said. "But as a hint, I'll tell you she's obsessed with Quidditch."

James raised his eyebrows. "Well, that shouldn't be that hard then. It's Stephanie Rayburn, isn't it? You guys had some sort of row, too."

Sirius scoffed. "Oh, she _wishes_. Do you know she supports the–"

"Is it Emily Gardner?" Lily asked.

"Nope. Two questions left."

"You guys! _Think__!_ Do something!" Lily was desperate. James furrowed his brow and exchanged serious looks with Remus, as if they were riffling through their collective memories through a look. Suddenly, a smile spread on their face and Remus even snapped.

"It's Sarah Appleby, isn't it?" Remus cried triumphantly. Sirius blinked a moment or two and slowly pushed down a finger, showing only one question was left in the game. The three collectively groaned.


	10. ten

"Who do you think it is?" Lily stared at the lone finger standing in the air. Only one question? Where had all the others gone so quickly?

"I don't know," James scratched his head. "I don't really know any other girls Sirius is interested in."

"Well–"

"Hey! What are you guys doing?"

Peter stood over them, hands in pockets with a curious expression at solemn Sirius who was holding his index finger high in the sky.

"Are you trying to pick the sky's nose?" Peter asked with a quirk of his eyebrows. "You look pretty weird." Sirius ignored him.

"We're playing a game," Lily said. "We're trying to guess which girl Sirius is going to buy something for. And it's really hard–"

"Oh, it's Sarah Appleby, right?" Peter suggested carelessly, his features bright.

"_Nope!_" Sirius yelled happily, leaping into the air and dancing on the armchair. "Ha ha ha! You owe me Galleons! Gimme, gimme, gimme!"

"_Peter!_" the three collectively groaned. The poor boy shrugged and apologized all around. Lily's face was bright red, irritated she'd lost.

"How much do you need?" She pulled out her purse. Gone was the illusion of having Sirius groveling at her feet…

"Ten Galleons," he said after much thought. "Thank you, Lily." He smiled. "Well, I need to go and buy the thing now, so I'll talk to you guys later–"

"_Wait!_" Remus grabbed Sirius' arm. "You have to at least tell us who the girl is!"

Sirius shrugged. "It was McGonagall. She's making me buy her a tin of biscuits because I used hers to plug all the girls' lavatory toilets." He smiled at their shocked faces. "Fun game, guys."

Lily groaned and fell into her chair. "_Bloody biscuits_..."

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><p>Hope you enjoyed the story. In honor of our favorite Transfiguration professor, my new story: <em>Beginner's Luck. <em>Minnie love forever!


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